The Key to Feeling Lighter and Sparking Lasting {Postpartum & All} Weight Loss

I get asked often what “the best diet” or the “most effective method of exercise” is.

I usually respond by asking, “Well, how do you want to feel?”

The most common response I hear {in one way or another} is “lighter”. Lighter as in less weight {physical and emotional}. Lighter as in more comfortable in your own skin. Lighter as in less time spent worrying about what method is best and just knowing what will work. Can you relate?

When we become a mother, there is *so much* pressure to act like we’ve got it all together, to be perfect and to get our bodies and lives “back”. Let’s be real though, this doesn’t just extend to motherhood – as women we struggle our whole lives with trying to get the body we think will bring happiness and to act like we’re pulling off Superwoman status with ease.

But what if we changed the conversation? Changed the approach? What if instead of self-loathing our way “back” (or forcefully “into” a life + body we desire), we self-loved ourselves forward? Forward into a relationship with ourselves that embraced the changes we’ve been through and continually go through {physically, emotionally, mentally, spiritually and in every way I can think possibly of} and focused on creating joy, confidence and energy through radical self-love and acceptance?

What if the key to feeling lighter {in body & mind} and sparking lasting {postpartum and any} weight loss was made simple and enjoyable even, by following that exact path? And what if taking that approach also crafted a life where you feel good in your own skin right now {instead of after you’ve lost the weight}?

Flipping the conversation means that instead of waiting on the weight to live your best and most desired life, you focus on how you want to feel – physically, yes – but deeper – on a soul level. Specifically, what FEELINGS do you want more of? The goal is to fill your life with those feelings and small, daily actions you can take to feel the way you desire. For example, if you desire more joy {as in you desire to be joyFULL}, you can lead with the question, “what brings me joy?” // “what could I do right now to experience joy?” // “what food brings me joy?”.

Approaching your life from a place of being FULL {of the feelings you desire} shifts your focus from one of lack to abundance. We’re adding in the good stuff instead of self-loathing and forcing yourself to do things that to “get you there”. See the difference? To support you in trying this approach on, today I’m sharing three of my favorite strategies that I use with my health coaching clients:

 

WHERE TO START:

*PleasureFULL & JoyFULL* – Seek to Cultivate Pleasure & Joy Daily in Small Ways:

Anytime that there’s a lack of joy and pleasure {that are usually eaten up by the mundane tasks & responsibilities of your life – which definitely has a serious uptick postpartum and as a momma}, you experience an increase in food-based cravings – like baked sweets, chocolate, ice cream, soft + filling starches, ice cream, alcohol, salt and cheese (to name a few). Behind each craving is a 100% legitimate {usually NON-food based} reason that essentially boils down to an internal need you’re neglecting; and cravings are one of the ways the body communicates its needs + your soul’s desires. Most of us interpret these needs as food-based cravings, so indulge in them, then still wonder why we don’t actually feel better afterwards (not to mention the shame + guilt cycle we enter into).

Try this instead: CREATE A FEEL GOOD LIST. Write down as many things as you can think of – big and small – that make you feel good and bring you pleasure and joy {physically and emotionally}. It can be as simple as drinking more water and eating more vegetables at every meal to a spa day (in-home or a treat-yo-self situation), date night (or sex!) with your significant other, meeting up with girlfriends, moving your body, meditating, taking deep breaths, adding flowers to your desk, candles to your home, or reading a book. Anything and everything that makes you feel good that you could do RIGHT NOW. Then try to do at least one thing from this list every day and be sure to add in at least one thing (just for you) that you can look forward to!

 

*MindFULL* – When Your Weight Is Stuck, Look at Where in Life You’re “Stuck”: 

How often as women do we find ourselves “waiting on the weight” before we fully embrace life and do all the things we want to do? Or how much time do we spend imagining how awesome life would be if we were 10 pounds lighter? 40 pounds lighter?

Here’s the truth – you’re never going to get “there” – and even *if* you lose the weight you’d like, it doesn’t make your life full. Just as your body grows and regenerates every day, your soul needs growth as well. So I want to ask you: are you truly *living* your life right now {in all the ways you “would” if you were lighter/happier/richer/had more time} or are you just surviving? What are you not making space for that you KNOW would make you feel better? Believe me, I know there’s definitely an element of surviving during different seasons of your life and especially those first few months postpartum, but in order to bring yourself out of the fog, out of the overwhelm, out of the wallowing in “loss” of self or body, you must (you must!) spend time cultivating the needs of your soul (see below for some ideas on this!) in order to become “unstuck” in negative habits, thoughts patterns and beliefs that ALL stall weight loss efforts.

So if you feel like you’ve tried everything and are still struggling, maybe it’s not your outer body that needs addressing. As a fitness professional and Integrative Nutrition holistic health coach, I can tell you with 100% conviction that it’s not {only} the physical landscape (ex. food and fitness) that needs changing in order to make that stubborn weight budge. Instead, it takes an honest look at what emotional weight (which I believe we all come to bear in some capacity as a mother and a woman) you’re holding onto; the stories you keep telling yourself about your body and the attitude in which you approach your life, your body and it’s worth.

{Another important place to look as women, is how we’re supporting our cycle – and whether we’re submitting to and honoring the cyclicality of our ever-changing lives, talents and body’s needs or we’re completely ignoring them and sabotaging our hormonal health – more on that another time!}.

You can’t keep waiting on the weight, waiting for things to slow down or get easier, for life to happen for you – every season has its struggles, every season passes in the blink of an eye. So instead of forcing change through nutrition or exercise, what if you engaged in self-loving practices that made your life full? And by full, I mean that it’s imperative as a woman and/or a mom to take time for your own growth and care. Will (my son) fills up my heart in ways I’d never known or experienced, but that’s not a substitute for taking time for myself to recharge all the energy I output (physically, mentally, emotionally and on a soul-level) – and the same goes for any other relationship, career or commitment in your life.

 

*SoulFULL* – Seek to Fill Up on Soul Food:
Our soul foods are what really feed us and drive our happiness. They “fill us up” from the inside so that we don’t seek comfort, solace and fulfillment from the “outside” {in food or superficial things}.

Your SOUL FOOD includes:

• being surrounded with loving, deep relationships (with yourself and others)
• having a fulfilling, balanced work life and career (“career” being an interchangeable word with your life’s work and purpose)
• self-care – simply put, caring for yourself daily; doing things that make you feel good + recharge your energy, increase your vitality and create mental space
• engaging in a spiritual practice that gives purpose and meaning to your life

So if you’re frustrated and “stuck”, I encourage you to try these methods and take a look at your soul food. It’s a new path that involves loving yourself (as you are) and filling yourself up from the inside. It’s your answer to ditching diets, extreme exercise and actually getting the results you want. For reals. Let’s take up this new way together; change the conversation of how we treat ourselves so we can bring a fuller, more joyful self to every aspect of our life. You deserve it, beautiful. Sending love and light. -Whitney

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Did you like this post? Please share! If you can relate to it or have a comment/question, I’d love to hear from you! {whitney @ macksmo.com}. Together ladies, we are stronger and we deserve MO(re). So much love to you, all my readers!

 

{*Photos by Sarah Heitman & Kate L Porter*}